Komatozno delovanje in misel na “ljud”


Napisano 16.12.2009 22:16 | avtor: robertinho

Ozirati se na napisano…na nazaj…je neproduktivno. Takšno početje narekuje neuspeh. Vsaj, ko gre za bloganje.

To počnem že leta. Letos malo manj… Veliko manj. Premalo? Ali pa enostavno ni ničesar za povedati? Dodati? Odvzeti?

Kaprica današnjega dne bi bila: ljudje ostajamo ljudje.

V primeru moje nekdanje sošolke bi veljalo: ljud se druži z ljudmi.

No, sicer pa se je začela zima. Predstanje tistega, kar prihaja. Pomlad. Februar. Odhodi in mahanje v pozdrav. Nekaj solza in spet novo poglavje. Pogledi skozi okno na samotno ulico, ki je začuda vedno nekoga polna. VEDNO.

In spet smiljenje in ukvarjanje s samim seboj. Patetika. V pravem pomenu besede. Če mi je všeč ali ne.

Kdo ve…morda spet kaj napišem. Se preberem. In me dejansko en drek briga kaj si o tem kdo misli. Berite kaj drugega. TO JE MOJE PISANJE. Pa, saj ste vendar na spletu. Wikipedia ima vedno kak zanimiv podatek, ki je zrasel na zeljniku onanirajočega Indijca, ki opravlja delo kakega Britanca…ker je pač Outsourcing ekstremno popularen.

Se mi zdi, da sem včasih imel kaj več za povedat. Morda je krivo delo, ki ga opravljam. Posipam se s pepelom in se grem Sizifovega porivanja navkeber. Se splača? Niti ne. Pa vendar. Malo me je mazohista. Ne bom pa dovolil, da mi nekdo potisne prst v rit.

Pišem od leta 2006… od napisanega je ostalo skoraj nič. Pa ne zato, ker me je sram napisanega. Zato, ker preteklost prežvečim in jo pustim za seboj. Tu in tam privre in me vrže na kavč v nekdanjem mojem stanovanju, kjer sem kraljeval samo jaz. Zdaj so časi drugačni. Ukvarjam se s trebuhom, s prehrano… Z zbujanjem zjutra, pekočim želodcem… Tipično. Skorajda odraslo. Nič brezskrbno. In kamen si naložim sam. Popolnoma sam.

Sem pa še vedno tukaj. Živim lastno legendo in se upiram času…in cepljenju proti gripi. Ker ne verjamem, da je svinjska lahko gripa…svinjski so lahko ljudje. Ali pa kak “ljud”.

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Religulous…and other stuff


Napisano 25.05.2009 16:23 | avtor: robertinho

There is much to talk about when approaching to the term »Religion«. We cannot stay in the halls of only one. We must grabb all of them and try to find what do they all have in common. What might that be, is that all of them teach of G’d – the ultimate Truth – that reigns somewhere, is unseen, is amazing, great, jelaous and only One. Even if we talk of polytheistic religions, we come to the conclusion that in the end there’s this one god that created all other gods to be.

 But when we talk about religion, we shouldn’t use only one point of stand, cos we immediately become bias in all terms. We stand the ground of one of the ultimate truths. That is why, we must look at religion as of something that simply exists, not as an anomaly, but necessity of human being.

 

In Bill Maher’s »Religulous«, it’s stated that religion is an anomaly becouse of that arrogant certainty that exists in every believer. That is brilliantly true, but also gives a slap in the face to every person that somehow believes that there is something out there and is still rational and stands on firm ground.

 

From the perspective of Religulous, we get to see that religion is on the whole, a dangerous and idiotic mass hysteria.

 

As an believer, you get offended and as an atheist, you get amused. But what happens, if you find it interesting enough to point out the red line of it all and that is doubt?

 

Many men in history had doubt and we all read what has happened to those men who doubted so much, that they questioned the authority of clericism of any kind. I will not be the one that draws only Catholic church into this mess, cos that would do much harm in understanding the history of Islam, Judaism, Protestantism (in all its forms), Buddhism, Hinduism, etc.

They all had their Gallileo Gallilei’s that came to have doubt. For no one has faith that strong that they do not have doubt, for doubt is a part of human nature as it is to believe. So, faith, belief or whatever you wish to call it is something that is a part of who we as human species are. We must ask questions, we must learn and we must seek kowledge.

 

It is true that many religions forbid doubt and hate too many questions, but if we are just observers, we might find many answers in all religions. Not in a New Ageian way, but in drawing paralells and trying to come to the root of it all. 

 

As Bill Maher made his point in the end of that movie:

 

There is only one reasonable standpoint. It is not the arrogant certainty of religion, but doubt. Doubt is inherently humble.

 

This statement is brilliant. I might even call it genious. Why? Simply because (and I stated this before) all religions, whether we acknowledge it or recognize it or not, teach that G’d – the ultimate Truth – is also ultimately unknowable.

 

There is no one that has faith so strong that they do not have doubt. We never know all there is to know, nor can we, for we are human. Doubt is indeed inherently humble, because it is the explicit and implicit acknowledgement that we don’t know all the answers, and this makes it virtuous.

 

It’s absolutely amazing how Maher gets to portray doubt as something virtuous. And that is what gives me even more interest in finding out why do we need and seek something called G’d, which is contrary to what Maher says, that we should grow up and “give up” religion before we destroy each other and ourselves. That is the line that got me thinking. Are we really going to destroy humanity with religion? Is that even possible? I mean, isn’t it that just contrary to what made us human anyway? We seek for something, for answers just beacuse of religion itself? Or? Our human heritage is actually based on religion. We are who we are and we can’t change it. But what we must find out, is how are we going to stop to treat religion as a weapon, because we do that constantly and rapidly. 

My view on it all is that we need to teach people humanism, respect and agreement inside all religions. We need to eliminate stories of hate, humiliation and killing that produce all the fundamentalist ideas in the world today. Only with knowledge and teaching ourselves and our loved ones, we might achieve the ultimate religion of human kind and that is »knowing«. We must know. We shouldn’t be escaping and saying we don’t really care about all that. We need to learn history, only that how, we will be able to look and see into the future. If something bad was done before, why do we need to repeat it? 

With doubt in virtual biased products of our daily lives, we get to the stage where we don’t get to sleep as happy customers, but those who raise questions. Only then will clerics see it’s over, we need to speak truth. Acknowledgement of history, facts, science and rationalism may lead to perfect score. We need to be relevant questioners. We need to know why, when and how. That is what makes us humans! 

But there emerges the problem of it all and that’s oppression of those who ask. In Muslim, Christian and Jewish circles, you might have questions, but if there’s no rational answer, you shouldn’t doubt in written »truth«, but have faith. And that is the situation that eliminates progressive thinking and thinking outside the box. 

What is faith? Is it certain? Is it rational? Is it moral, so to say? Or does it lead us to do unrational things? I mean, all the guys in the Casino’s have faith, don’t they? And instead of doing something normal, they have faith, the luck is on their side. So do religious masses, when they cheer that G’d is on their side and then go and kill couple of thousands of innocent people, blow up themselwes or strand their kids cos they thaught G’d spoke to them. 

But when does religious faith become good and productive? When you believe, you will find an answer not through some mumbo jumbo or through some miracle and Holy Spirit, but through yourself. By educating and answering to yourself that there may be something outthere, but I really don’t think it had anything to do with the storm that hit me yesterday. Doubt and rational faith. 

And no, G’d does not have mysterious ways and universe does not move in your direction if you’re being positive… You are the master of your body, time and timetable. If it hits you, it just did. Now go and study why!

While we as men, humanity are the ones we need to believe in and have faith. We are not G’d’s per se, but we might be constructors of something great and that is konwledge above all. And by knowing, I mean understanding, learning, tolerating. We must lean to that. That is our future after all.

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Lady is a tramp


Napisano 8.03.2009 18:37 | avtor: robertinho

Predpomladno razganjanje dobiva najlepšo obliko doslej. Dejansko je skoraj nemogoče govoriti o razganjanju kot takem in sploh vrednotiti tole čutenje na ta način…nima smisla. Bo pa res, da me je zadelo. “I am all on drugs”, bi si lahko sedaj pel…čeprav trezen kot še nikoli. Premišljeno, skoraj modro…v zvezi.

“Be careful what you wish for”, je dejal nek tip v enem filmu…nisem ziher katerem…čakte, pogooglam…aha! R.L. Stine iz kolekcije Goosebumps. In te omenjene “goosebumps” še kako čutim. Cel čas. Tudi, ko nisem z njo. And that’s what made all the difference. 

Kakorkoli, mislim, da je prišel čas, ko bom rekel tisti “adieu” in zaključil svoje epopeje v smislu iskanja ljubezenske popolnosti, ki mi je tolikokrat prinesla kontrakcije…seveda zato, ker mi pogled na situacijo v kateri se nahajam ne kaže nič drugega kot to, da sem to našel. Tokrat tudi brez tistih ante-fazem krčev. 

V tej luči bi torej jaz nekako zaključil s pisanjem o ljubezni, težavah z njo, seksu, ostalem… nekako se mi ne zdi več smiselno vse skupaj, saj sem našel nekaj, kar je preseglo vsa moja pričakovanja, verovanja, prepričanja. Ravno zato bi rekel adijo. 

Nasvidenje v naslednji vojni!

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Sistematično nepozoren


Napisano 27.02.2009 13:58 | avtor: robertinho

Ne vem zakaj ravno zdaj, danes, včeraj, pretekli teden. Ne vem zakaj ravno jaz. Prav tako ne vem čemu vse skupaj. Najbolj mi gre pa na živce to, da komaj diham. Srce se gre bobnanja na dvojno, oči mi kar žarijo…vse je kot bi bil naspidiran…

To je rezultat telesne kemične reakcije, ki ji pravimo zaljubljenost. Težava je v tem, da je zaljubljenost termin kateri nekako zajema bedake in konje. Dejansko. “mašeš glavom ko konj”. 

Pri meni je nekako drugače. Všeč mi je intelekt. In poleg nje sem še jaz sam sebi všeč. Pa ne tak, da bi blo treba zdaj pretiravat…

Ehe, ehe, ehe.

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Moji čudoviti gojzarji


Napisano 16.02.2009 17:10 | avtor: robertinho

…so še vedno nekje na polici v trgovini…

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Popolna nepopolnost in njeno čudovito vedenje


Napisano 10.02.2009 21:05 | avtor: robertinho

Dejansko sem jo tisti večer prvič videl v živo. Doslej je bila le bleda podoba nekakšnih hitro ujetih fotografij objavljenih na spletu. Sedaj je dobila vse tisto, kar je povzročilo pravi mali kaos v mojem premišljevanju o ženskah in teh rečeh nasplošno. Dobila je podobo, ki že skoraj meji na potrebo po trežnjenju, saj me je popolnoma opijanila. Njen glas sem že dodobra poznal. Večkrat sem se spraševal, poslušajoč nji, kako bi zvenelo, ko bi izgovarjala moje ime. In ga je. Sama od sebe. Sama pri sebi. Prvič sem slišal svoje ime v čudovitem tonu, ki mi je omrtvičil vse ostale čute. Kot hipnoza. Pogled, pogled, pogled,… nisem mogel nehat pogledovat proti njej… Kot v nekakšnem transu… Vse okrog mene je postal nek višek…njen ples v ritmih glasbe, katero bi človek najraje preslišal, je bil čudovit. Vse je bilo čudovito, čutno, skoraj čarobno. Njene roke so se oprijemale pasu, ki je stekal čez njene prsi držeč torbico v zlatih odtenkih. 

V glavi mi je odmeval samo njen glas, njeno ime, njena podoba, njeni gibi, njeno vse… In spet čutim! In spet sem živ! Spet zaljubljen? Če sem, je tokrat ponovitev vseh nesrečnih ljubezni ponovno na obzorju. 

Že dolgo nisem bil v takšnem stanju. Še kako sem si tega želel!! 

Četudi bo vse skupaj romalo v maloro, sem ponovno čutil, čutim in bom čutil…dokler ne zamre kot je doslej vse zamrlo…so zamrle…se spremenile v prah in pepel pozabe, ki tu in tam prhne in me oslepi, ko je treba bit najbolj pozoren. 

Ljubil bi jo. Celo.

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Glede Hrvaske…khm, boli me za politiko?!


Napisano 21.12.2008 21:56 | avtor: robertinho

Am, cisto na kratko… Vegeto bom se naprej kupoval… Prav tako se bom sladkal z Bajadero, v Zagreb bom se vedno lazil po mlince na Dolac, se vedno se bom mastil z Pasko jagnjetino, poslusal bom Oliverja, Gibonnija in si dovolil, da me dirneta u dubinu, ker resnici na ljubo…samo Hrvati znajo tako pet… Nasi pac ne trofijo melodij…Ok, Predin ze malo, ampak vseeno premalo.

Se vedno bom sel v Opatijo na palacinke, se vedno bom na Cresu gledal soncne zahode s kaksno domacinko v objemu (Ivana in my mind)… Se vedno bom raje gledal tekme na HTV-ju…

Se vedno se bom smejal njihovem humorju ala Zlocesta djeca, Vecernja skola in se nekoliko legendarnih…

Se vedno bom ponosen, ko bom sredi Pariza v neki high-society diskoteki zaslisal Colonio…

Se vedno bom srecen, ko bom spomladi kruzal po Istri in uzival v pokusini sirov in vina…

Se vedno bom hodil na cage v Zagreb, Varazdin, Split, Rijeko, Pulo…

Glede politikov… boli me kurac zanje… they come and go… kar ostane so odnosi, fina kavica in cavrljanje, cik pavzice na Tkalci… Hard Rock café Zagreb… sve jos mirise na nju….

Nisem Hrvat, nisem idiot, nisem izdajica, samo res mi ni, da bi podlegel manipulacijam taksnega tipa, ki ga sedaj vsi skupaj izvajajo… Se gremo zacetka 90-ih? Again? Bojkot proizvoda? Really?  Mater ste tupi!

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Kaj pa Božič?


Napisano 17.11.2008 12:33 | avtor: robertinho

Sedemnajstega novembra zjutraj me začnejo težit z Jingle bellsi in opominjanjem na to, da moram pravičas poskrbet za darila!

Are you just mental?!!!!

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Kako veš…


Napisano 22.10.2008 11:18 | avtor: robertinho

Recimo, če nekdo izgleda takole

Potem je jasno, da je nekaj narobe.

In danes v The Sun-u preberem, da je zgorajšnji “dungeon dad” izjavil, da se je rodil kot posiljevalec. A res? A to zdaj velja kot opravičilo? Đizas!

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Kraljica in konji


Napisano 22.10.2008 08:44 | avtor: robertinho

Zanimajo jo konji. In zato je pršla v Slovenijo. Japajade. A res? A se to na koga nanaša al ma pa rada horsburger? Upam, da se jo bo pelal do Tivolija na enga. Majo dobre.

Sam bi blo pa recimo ful svinsk, da ji podarimo horsburger v obliki lipicanca…

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